Nina's Stillwater Calendar

Monday, October 1

Women and "You should've known I was angry."

On the drive home from wakeboarding last Thursday, Brad did an incredibly funny impression of a woman pouting for five days over something petty and then getting mad at her significant other for not figuring it out:

Man: Honey, here's the cucumber you asked for.
Woman: Thanks.
...five days later....
Man: Honey, you've seemed upset the last few days. Is something wrong?
Woman: You know perfectly well what's wrong. Last Saturday you brought home an American cucumber when I asked for an English cucumber. And you didn't even apologize. You just handed it to me and went to watch TV!

And as Brad pointed out, nothing is funny without a kernel of truth. While he was doing the impression, I was thinking of all the times I've done the exact same thing. Only I never waited five days to blow up, five hours was more like my limit. Brad's solution: Women should tell men when they're upset so that men can handle the problem before it escalates. It sounds like a great solution:

Man: Honey, here's the cucumber you asked for.
Woman: I asked for an English cucumber.
Man: Oh. I didn't realize there was a difference. I'm sorry. Do you have time for me to run back to the store?

But it never seems to work like that:

Man: Honey, here's the cucumber you asked for.
Woman: I asked for an English cucumber.
Man: What's the big deal? It's just a cucumber. Can't you use this one?
Woman: If I could use that one I wouldn't have asked for something else, would I? And the big deal is the two hours I have spent fixing a special dinner tonight that is now wasted because I don't have an English cucumber to finish it with.

Or:

Man: Honey, here's the cucumber you asked for.
Woman: I asked for an English cucumber.
Man: How was I supposed to know there was a difference?
Woman: I assumed you were smart enough to realize I wouldn't bother specifying "English" cucumber unless there was a reason. My bad.

The problem with Brad's solution is that men just don't like to admit they're wrong. And sometimes the problem isn't as small as a wrong cucumber:

Man: Honey, I hit your new car backing out of the driveway. Don't worry. I'll take it to the bodyshop later today.

Or:

Woman: Have you seen my purple sweater?
Man: Oh, I threw that in the wash and apparently it was dry-clean only. I had to throw it away.

What woman wants to ask for an apology for something her man already knows he screwed up on and apparently just hasn't cared enough to apologize for? Begging for an apology feels like nagging since you are bringing it up again and when you get the apology it feels insincere anyway:

Woman: Have you seen my purple sweater?
Man: Oh, I threw that in the wash and apparently it was dry-clean only. I had to throw it away.
Woman: And you didn't think to mention this to me?
Man: It just happened two days ago and we've been really busy and I just forgot. Sorry.

So in theory perhaps Brad's solution is great. It's just that the men mess it all up.

2 comments:

Scott said...

Def. Man (n.) - The weakest link in a human relationship ;).

M. O. said...

hahaha oh so true!!

So, going to the DHS thing?